jehovahzwetness:

My GPS lady sounds like she hasn’t been fucked in a long time

118,509 notes 40 minutes ago (|)

alexheree:

john green this is all ur fault stop blaming the stars

317,329 notes 1 hour ago (||)

panicacidide:

Apparently it’s not socially acceptable for a man to invite another man out just for coffee or to go out for a meal, in case it’s perceived as a date. Like it’s fine if you wanna go to the pub and drink beer and have a chat but make it non-alcoholic and suddenly you’re not straight anymore? You can go to the cinema together but ONLY if it’s an action movie. You guys can’t even just go shopping with each other. Oh masculinity, so fragile, so strange. 

81,522 notes 2 hours ago (||)
182,141 notes 3 hours ago (||)
elahthompson:

the goat is not a student…..he’s a teacher.

elahthompson:

the goat is not a student…..he’s a teacher.

63,456 notes 3 hours ago (||)

when attractive people have low standards

image

267,431 notes 4 hours ago (||)
5,585 notes 5 hours ago (||)
101,799 notes 6 hours ago (||)
324,666 notes 10 hours ago (||)

teamrocketing:

*knocks you out with a calculator* bet you weren’t counting on that

372,966 notes 10 hours ago (||)
π